Don’t bother my head by asking conundrums, I beg of you. Just let me discover myself in my own way.

I just watched Watchmen.

I feel like I need to announce that, it was the first time I had seen it. I missed it in theaters, I don't tend to go to movies alone, so I waited for it to come out on DVD (so that I could download a high enough quality torrent to do it the justice it deserved)

I feel like I need to talk about it.
This is because I think I'm smarter than you and that my take on it, my reaction, can in some way be either entertaining or beneficial to you, the reader.

I'm not going to. If you haven't read the actual graphic novel, I'd suggest it. But I'd suggest that for nearly most any movie made from another source, that is just the kind of thing you are supposed to say.

Although that isn't true for superhero movies. I wouldn't tell you to, say, read Batman comics. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.

This is known as elitism.
If you haven't heard of X before they made a movie about it, you deserve your place as an uneducated troglodyte.
Cave dweller.
From the latin from the ancient greek τρώγλη "hole" and δύω "i get into".

Except the majority of comic book readers fit into that definition.
A conundrum.

Incidentally, the word "conundrum" has an unknown etymology. It is a conundrum.

Of course, if I don't think the work was any good to begin with (Twilight) or if I simply didn't know it took any other form (Contact, High Fidelity), I wouldn't recommend seeing the movie.
Or maybe I would recommend seeing the movie but not reading the source material.
Or maybe I'd recommend whatever third option I haven't said I'd recommend yet.

Incidentally, the same fellow (Nick Hornby) who wrote High Fidelity also wrote About A Boy)

What I am trying to say is even though at some times I convince myself I am much, much smarter than you, the reader, all of the time

I am probably right. But I am probably not a good movie critic.

I never like talking about movies after the credits roll, or on the drive home, or for a week after I first see them.
Fellow moviegoers give me shit about how immovable I am right after a movie ends, and how I won't leave until I've sat there for a while.

I am digesting. Savoring. Because the spell breaks the minute you exit the theater and everyone screws it up with their dumb opinions and their different-from-your interpretations.

The way I deal with movies, and the way I dealt with Watchmen, was to immediately think about something else for a while. Let it percolate through the part of my brain that isn't the utmost outer layer. I'll have an opinion in a week.

Or, I would, if I hadn't read it a month ago. Which is why I'll say the same thing I say after every movie I have to not think about.

It was a good movie!


Editor's Edit: Oh and also, Jay-Z has decided enough is enough. Seriously. Fix your shit, hip-hop, or Jay-Z might get angry enough to stop having sex with Beyonce, building a basketball stadium, and smoking the most expensive cigars in the world and Fix. It. Himself.