Their Vocations Are Petrified And No Longer Connected With Life

I have to declare a major.
If not now, soon.

What on earth am I going to do with myself.
I am a person based on lies, or at least intense heresy.
I'm very good at pretending to be very good at something.
Or rather, convincing people I am smarter than them.
If you cut off my internet I would just be a bit of a prick, I fear.

I have conflicting interests in not-being-poor and not-being-uninteresting, and until I decide which one is more important to me, I cannot progress.

Here is some Slum Village. I'm trying to be less coercive in my musical presentation, because it will either end up bullying people into agreeing with me or challenging people to disagree automatically. So here is some Slum Village, it is what I have been listening to recently, I hope someone else likes it too.

I wish I didn't have to decide between Science and Not-Science, but that is really what it boils down to. Actually, I have three options, but one of them is by nature a non-option and is thus disqualified.They are as follows: Something Science-y (Biology, Chemistry, Mathematics), Something Non-Science-y (Logic, Philosophy, English, History), or something Neither Science-y or Non-Science-y (Business, Politics, Other Boring Shit I Refuse To Acknowledge 70% Of Society Makes A Living Off Of).

I have no auxiliary inborn talent of Art or Music or Passion to hide behind.

Go down the street. Ask people what they do. Conduct a survey. Or, let the fine folks at the Bureau of Labor Statistics do one for you.
That is what America did in 2006.
America did a lot of shit I am not interested in doing.

I have come to an interesting conclusion:
By accepting this life of Academia, by continuing my education to this college undergraduate level -Or rather, by my very nature of being (i.e. a hopeless intellectual) - I have set incredible self-restrictions.
I can never just work Retail, or be a Cashier, or an Office Clerk (the three most common job areas reported in 2006 by the BLS survey of 150,000,000 people).
This is not to say I will never hold jobs in these areas, it is just that I will only do so as a means of sustenance while I work towards something else.

I had originally written "something greater", but then I looked real hard in a mirror and realized I had no definition of the concept of greater-than-ness as a predicate of an occupation.

The jobs you learn to do at college are only a thin sliver of the total amount of possible jobs there are in the world, and they tend to fall within a few constraints. That is to say, the vast majority of jobs done by Americans today are not taught in Universities, they are taught in Real Life.

My dad played music and worked in a recording studio. My mom plays music and refurbishes antique furniture and writes columns.
My brother, curséd man of letters as he is, just got a Masters in Creative Writing and thus serves tequila in a Mexican bar. Previously he sold designer jeans.

The concept I am dancing around is this: The very act of going to college and declaring a major is equivalent to claiming intellectual separation (and subsequent superiority) over the vast majority of all people.
The reason I am dancing around it is because I simultaneously dislike and believe in such a concept.

I am reluctant to make such a strident claim. My sheepish and apologetic-to-the-world nature rebels at the thought.
I already have made such a strident claim. My supermassive ego and perceptive cynicism arrived logically at the result years ago.

Here are a few of the classes I took at the University of Washington:
-General Chemistry
-Biology - Introduction to Psychotropics
-History of the Space Age
-PreCalculus

Here are a few of the classes I took at Maui Community College:
-Asian Philosophy
-Regional Geography
-Archaeology
-Logic

I am exceedingly well rounded in the already-highly-specified meta-area of Academia. I can use a hyphen like a motherfucker and take average notes.
You want me to confine myself even further? Limit my possibilities, my potential?
My Verschränkung? (look that one up, fuckers)
Is that what you want? The collapse of my academic wavefunction? I won't stand for it. I rebel against the concept with every fiber of my being.

I fear I am headed towards a major in Philosophy and I will be destitute, worthless, unproductive and bored.
However, I will be witty, clever, and spiritually fulfilled, not to mention fun at parties.
I fear I am headed towards a major in Science and I will be not-smart-enough, secretly uninterested and confused, and bored.
However, I will be informed, impressive, and capable, not to mention fun at parties.

I kind of want to be a robopsychologist like Susan Calvin from Asimov's Robot series...